Within the cultural background which I come from, society has defined criteria for success to which each individual should refer. Among them, getting married and having one, shall we say ? Having several children is a must if you want to bang your chest and walk around with your head held high and your chest puffed out. Couples who find it difficult to conceive, without having to wait the WHO's 12-month limit required to talk about infertility, live in shame. They can no longer attend events, walk down the street or go to work without hearing the famous "so when are the kids coming ? ".

Women are at the centre of this stormy issue. If the couple do not have children, it can only be their fault. There is no way that family, in-laws, friends and acquaintances can imagine that it could be a case of sperm disorders or that the external stress suffered by this couple could justify the absence of toddlers running around the house. In this context, it is then unimaginable that a woman could dream of pursuing post-graduate studies for too long, travelling to achieve her goals. Otherwise society will judge her ambition guilty of her infertility. What I think as a woman, as a healthcare professional, is that everything is possible. One can pursue their professional dreams and be a mother at the same time. Be prepared to make enquiries and get educated about fertility matters. Not by your next-door neighbour who has had this or that experience which seems similar, but rather by professionals. It's about learning to do things as simple as counting your cycle, popularising visits to your gynaecologist, refusing to suffer the martyrdom of your period because society treats you like a sissy who can't cope with a simple period (it could well be a case of endometriosis which, if diagnosed and treated in time, will spare many women the status of infertile woman) ... And so many other things that it would be impossible to discuss in just 500 words. This "urogynaecological" education should not just be a women's issue, but men should be just as involved. And yes, it is possible by: limiting exposure of the testicles to heat (jacuzzi, sauna), adopting a balanced diet, regular check-ups of the genitals by a urologist ... To conclude, if you've come across this publication, this post, it means that either your couple, or a couple you're close to, is going through a difficult time. My message to you is that you're not alone, and don't be the person who adds to the mental burden on your loved ones.

‍

By Naomie Kamdem

‍